EIGHINGER: New poll indicates blondes can't win, even when they lose

Posted: Apr. 5, 2013 3:31 pm Updated: May. 4, 2013 8:15 pm

Since I have never been married to a blonde, and to the best of my aging memory only dated one in my bachelor days, I am the first to admit I might not be an expert in the information I am about to present. But that doesn't mean I do not find it rather fascinating.

A recent European study found that gentlemen no longer prefer blondes, that brunettes make better wives and girlfriends. Brunettes are more dependable, more focused, better cooks and housekeepers.

Remember, their words, not mine.

The study, which used 1,000 men as test subjects, said:

º 54 percent preferred a brunette wife, compared with 16 percent opting for a blonde.

º In terms of girlfriend status, 48 percent preferred brunettes, and 25 percent yearned for a blonde. (And 27 percent said neither, which gives hope to redheads and those with raven hair.)

Despite what these numbers may or may not illustrate, I don't look for any immediate shortages of blondes as a result. And may I say I fully support all colors of hair on women. I have no particular preference. I even like the blue, purple, pink and green shades we see these days. Hair today, gone tomorrow is the way I look at most women's approach to their colors and styles.

I'm also sure there are just as many blondes out there who are dependable and focused, and can cook as well as their brunette and redheaded sisters. What I'm not sure of when it comes to blondes is how or why they became the subject of so many jokes through the years. I'm certain there has been an equal number of brunettes who have done or said questionable things, but it's always the blondes who get singled out.

And it's always the blondes who have to defend themselves. Right or wrong, here are my favorite blonde comebacks -- from blondes.

º "I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb ... and I also know that I'm not blonde." -- Dolly Parton.

º "It is great to be a blonde. With low expectations it's very easy to surprise people." -- Pamela Anderson.

º "Going blonde is like buying yourself a light bulb." -- Heidi Klum.

º "I wasn't offered all that many blonde bombshell parts, to be honest. I think people believed from the beginning that I could actually walk and talk at the same time." -- Cameron Diaz.

º "I may be a dumb blonde, but I'm not that blonde." -- Patricia Neal.

º "Arthur Miller wouldn't have married me if I had been nothing but a dumb blonde." -- Marilyn Monroe.

In addition, you have to admire the self-deprecating humor a blond girl can throw at herself:

º "People talk to me more slowly now." -- Ann Widdecombe, a former British Conservative Party politician and novelist.

And then there are the types who could give any hair color a bad reputation:

º "There's nobody in the world like me. I think every decade has an iconic blonde, like Marilyn Monroe or Princess Diana, and right now, I'm that icon," -- Paris Hilton.

And finally, we'll end this discussion with the thoughts a man far wiser than the one writing this column:

"The hair is the richest ornament of women." -- Martin Luther.

Please notice, Mr. Luther did not diftferentiate between a blonde and brunette.


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