O'BRIEN: Minor-league baseball team making a splash

Posted: Apr. 9, 2013 6:01 am Updated: Jul. 2, 2013 8:15 am

Coming soon to a men's room near you: video games.

The Lehigh Valley IronPigs, a minor-league baseball team, last week unveiled new urinals that allows the user to play a video game as they, uh, go. You can't make this up.

As the person gets closer to the urinal, a quick video from the game's sponsor, which is an area urologist, pops on to the screen. After that, as The Allentown (Pa.) Morning Call wrote, "it's bladder up."

The urine stream of the user is used to control the game. The user plays a downhill ski game where the goal is to hit as many penguins as they can as the go down the course. The longer you go, the better your chances of piling up a high score. Players can enter a code on their smartphone to get their score sent to them and see where they are on the all-time leaderboard. The team, which is the Triple-A affiliate of the Philadelphia Phillies, plans to post high scores in real time on digital boards inside the stadium.

You have to wonder if anyone is going to poke the person next to them and say, ‘Hey, see that high score up there? That's mine."

The team thinks it has hit upon a great idea. Before the game made its debut, IronPigs General Manager Kurt Landes told the media that the games were "sure to make a huge splash."

The game is a great idea to keep you occupied while you're occupied. This looks to be a bathroom breakthrough.

The last big addition to the bathroom was when sports bars starting putting television screens above urinals so that you wouldn't miss a second of the game you were watching out in the bar. The best sports bars are the ones that have TVs in the stalls.

According to one European study, the average person who lives to be 75 years old spends a year and half of their life in the bathroom. Men spend more time on the throne than women do. That same UK study says men spend about 25 more minutes per week -- about 1:45 total -- on the toilet than women do.

If you're like me, you're always looking at ways to pass time when nature calls. You have to make the most out of that time, right?

Over the years, magazines and newspapers have been popular options. My mother usually keeps the "National Enquirer" handy. The bathroom seems like an appropriate place for that trashy news. My grandparents used to keep the big-print edition of "The Reader's Digest." Do they even print that any more?

According to, the most popular bathroom reading material is "Guinness Book of World Records." That makes sense. You want something that is going to be a quick read. Filling yourself with useless knowledge can't hurt.

If you're a parent of young children, the bathroom can be an oasis. If you haven't intentionally shut yourself in a bathroom to get a few minutes of peace from your little rug rats, you're doing it wrong.

The smartphone can come in handy when it comes to passing time in the bathroom. You can read, play games or do any number of things while you're biding your time. Just make sure not to drop it in the toilet.




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