Virtual reality

Posted: Dec. 7, 2017 12:01 am

Actual conversation:

I could totally kill a wolf.

No way. You're not good enough to kill a wolf.

Oh. Well if this was real life, then I could totally kill a wolf ... or a bear.

Well, yeah. You just can't kill them in this game.

At this point I have to weigh in: "Excuse me, did you say you could kill a wolf in real life?"

Uh, yeah! If he came at me I'd just cut him with a knife.

So ... for all the animal activists out there, let me just be clear, I don't condone killing wolves. However, children can be morbid and take conversations down all kinds of tangents and this is how you end up discussing the outcome of a human verses wolf fight.

I didn't necessarily want to discuss wolf killing or wolf attack survival. I wanted to drink my tea and maybe listen to Christmas music.

Here we are, though, and I feel the need to lay down some truths.

"First off, wolves hunt in packs. Second, if you were to go head-to-head with a wolf, a knife would be useless because he would bite before you would stab with him with any accuracy."

Well then I would shoot him!

Oh you would, would you? So you would be able to load a gun, aim and fire a fatal wound while under attack. Doubtful. Especially considering you've never done any of those things even in a relaxed environment.

OK, then, a bear. I could definitely kill a bear.

Apparently we've been gaming too long in the virtual world. I feel they inserted this just to clarify whether or not they have a grasp on reality. Clearly it's a "no," but I'm running out of daylight.

Sure. You could definitely kill a bear. Now put your coat on. Do you need help with that zipper or do you think you can manage?

Jen Reekie was born and raised in Quincy and received a communications degree at the University of Kansas, which has come in quite handy as she communicates every day with four children who don't hear a word she says. This stay-at-home mom enjoys the challenge, though, and shares her experiences in this blog, "Mum's the Word." She welcomes your feedback, questions and stories about staying sane while raising kids.